LAUSR

Keith Tester was my friend. He became my friend long before I met him in real life. Keith was an extraordinary correspondent, as others in this memoriam have also commented. I began my epistolary friendship with Keith in 2011, via our mutual friend Peter Beilharz. I now can’t recall why Peter suggested that we should be in touch, but it was an important moment for me. Keith had been Peter’s confidante during a difficult time for him, and he also became mine. Peter and I had fallen in love. Keith showed an exceptional generosity and openness to me, at a time when my other friends had chosen to withdraw their friendship. They felt I had betrayed them. I did not share my loss with Keith, but I think he understood that my letters to him, where I could speak openly about my friendship (and love) for Peter, were a salve for my soul. We discussed books we were reading, films we had watched and all aspects of the everyday and mundane. We had a long conversation over many days about Eurovision, which started as a joke, but turned into a discussion about what it means to be European and English. Keith had a longstanding project on the idea of ‘Englishness’. We discussed the proper way to pour tea – milk first, then tea, never the reverse. He loved the Downs and its old stone churches. Keith also loved the Italian café in Melbourne, Brunetti’s. I often took photos of the extravagant and elaborate cakes for which they are famous and sent them to him. He loved Nick Cave, but I found him too maudlin, although we agreed that the song with Kylie Minogue was excellent. I finally met Keith in 2013 in England. Peter and I went to Worthing and stayed with him and his family. We walked to the Worthing Pier on a windy evening. I have photos of us, blurred, but now treasured. I picked up a white pebble from the Worthing beach to remember our time together. It sits on our bookshelf. I wanted a place-making memento, a habit acquired over the years – sticks, rocks, pebbles, shells. It is now a memento mori. Keith visited Melbourne to work with us in 2014. We all met together in London in 2015 – we walked Carnaby Street in early December when the Christmas decorations